The Great Decider’s Blessed Gated Racing Discipline

The Great Decider’ Blessed Gated Racing Discipline

*some items not pictured

25 different, and in some cases non-production, individual slalom-specific tires collected over 15 years and carefully aged, 2 appropriate wheelsets(one closer to xc weight, one closer to DH, different widths for varying tire profiles, both with tubeless or tubed options)

Two totally dialed custom hardtails; One optimized with geometry and components for the two predominate course styles.  One for predominately high-speed grass courses and one bike optimized for more balanced, bmx influenced course design.  Both with the absolute finest suspension and brake tuning and modifications and lighting quick shifting, without compromising thrift or durability.

*not pictured
-3 different flat pedals(varying level of grip)
-DX spd’s
-Shoes- Nike Nico Voillouz signature clip shoes(exactly like the Lance shoes but infinitely better), motorhead edition vans tnt’s, Etnie’s og tag1’s and 5.10’s
-various costumes to suit the appropriate frequency of the Factory to Palmer Spectrum

I never realized how much I love DS until I started getting gear together for Highland Mountain’s slalom race this weekend, a course built the Moses of Northeastern US Slalom, Kyle Ebbet.
————————-

When I was a kid…
Well apparently I am still firmly stuck in 1999, and my hormonally crazed ideal of  what a “totally fu@king factory” slalom setup would look like.   I think it’s has to do with spending my summers in highschool chop-sawing 2hip Pork downtubes instead of getting Laid…
Not that this hyper-analytical near religious zeal will ever really help me do well in an event, but a stash like this makes you realize what a packrat you can become about things you deeply and truly love…. They are like pictures of the children and grand children I will never have.

God Bless Bicycles.  And God, please, help us save slalom and make it prosper. Saleh

Amen
————–
Why write this blogpost? To make slalom explode across the inter-sphere tubes like the very word of the deity you may or may not hear inside of you.

Ripping small hills in confined spaces IS everything sweet and pure and holy in mountain biking.

Never has there been a more perfect venue to do this in front of a bunch of friends, and maybe even for a medal and some media exposure.

What really made Palmer?   If you ask me, it was his epic slalom battles in an XC helmets against the Houseman’s, Carter and Pistol Pete.
We saw the snarling man full of absolute drive through some Spy Scoop XL’s and a tiny piece of styrofoam.    We felt the tension build between motos, and saw how hard all these guys could draw pistols in a duel.

Say it loud, and clearly, for long enough, and all the world can share in the wonderfull tenet that only Slalom will ever set us Free, that only Slalom will ever make us rich, and that Slalom, and only Slalom is The Great Deciders Blessed Gated Racing Discipline.
————————

Faithfully,
Mickey
Spooky Bikes

—